hello, I am not good at wordsing today so let's just get to the (hopefully) funny
doesn't that hurt your sunburn, Fitz?
after celebratory couch snuggles, I took advantage of the money Melba brought with her to give them an actual kitchen holy crap
also redid the living room both because it was necessary and because I didn't love the decorating the first time but just couldn't get it right. I think it's right now, though.
and put in a desk for Melba, who is a computer programmer. actually when she moved in she was the fucking mayor, but I made her quit because no Maxis job for you, Melba.
on that note, check out Melba's townie swag. this human is loaded.
suddenly Fitz realizes ey has never really given that upside-down book the painstaking examination it deserves
Melba: Oh, hi, sweetie, um... did you need something or...
Fitzgerald: What? Oh, Melba! I did not even see you there, ha ha ha! Ha.
Fitzgerald: That knife block... is not a poster.
Melba: Hi, baby.
Fitzgerald: mission accomplissshed
Melba: Hmmm, who is copping a surreptitious feel?
this went on
for quite some time.
so to town and the shotgun wedding chapel they went, to be married in the sight of Goth Jesus and all their friends.
sorry Fitz, I don't have any AF formalwear that isn't really femmey so that's the best I can do ._.
I guess by 'all their friends' I meant 'one creepy stranger'.
Fitzgerald: Open wide, here comes the choo-choo!
Melba: I am going to disregard this alarming babytalk because you are offering me cake.
eating wedding cake outside in the rain, how romantic~
I'm not even sure if I'm being sarcastic tbh.
marital intimacy, the non-sexual variety.
Fitzgerald: MY PAJAMAS!
if you think there's a lot of these pictures,
just bear in mind that you're only seeing the tip of the benign stalking iceberg.
this post would be about six times as long if I capped it every time this happened.
Melba: Just a heads up, I'll be grading your performance this time.
Fitzgerald: Can I get 'extra credit'? ;D
topless gaming = the best.
Fitzgerald: I hunger for artistic fulfillment.
is that what the kids are calling it nowadays
obligatory childbirth pic. I would make a joke about it but childbirth really terrifies me to be totally honest so let's just leave it at that. /o\
but this cutie Jem was the result!
what a good note on which to begin your life, Jem.
Jem: *made hirself a wading pool*
gross, but you're too cute for me to resent you for it.
and apparently Melba has no qualms about sitting the fuck down in a puddle of toilet water either so right on I guess
I'm not sure why I'm capping these, I guess cuz ~accomplishments~!
meanwhile Fitz has the pregnancy voms again. poor Fitz :(
Jem: Tell me more about your unholy mission and profane right to rule mankind, Satan! I am a willing pupil.
Jem: MOMMMMM PUT ME DOWN I HAVE TO GET PLENTY OF REST SO I CAN JOIN THE DARK FORCES IN THEIR HELLISH CRUSAAAAAAAAADE
Fitzgerald: THE BATJAMAS ARE BACK!
Melba: Fuck you, weeds.
Blondie von Badshirt: *reads a newspaper that isn't his without asking, rude*
Jem continues to cozy up to the dark forces via stuffed toys.
clearly zie takes after hir parent, who also has a history of standing in toilets.
snow! also, that cactus. I love it.
time to welcome another baby, I see
and that is it for now, bon voyage.